So I thought that I’d work for you for a few months, earn enough to get married and to travel to Australia and then…’ Words failed her, and she merely grinned wildly, prettily, assured of her own genius. Edward felt his face set into the mould of cynicism. ‘And your beloved is happy with this plan, with the idea of you sleeping with other men?’ She flushed, whispered so delicately that Edward had to strain to hear: ‘He wouldn’t know.’ Taking in his dismayed face, she continued. ‘I could keep it a secret. It would only be for a little while. And I wouldn’t be doing it because I want to, it would be to fund our future-‘ He held up his hand to silence her mid-sentence and, as she blinked in confusion, he waved his hand dismissively. ‘Thank you for your time but I do not feel that you’re the appropriate candidate for this venture. I wish you and your fiancé the best of luck.’ She snorted in anger, turned on her heel and stormed from the room, scattering falling hairpins across the. Hurt, she dressed and made her way behind him up the hill, and back into the car. He reached for her, pulling her into the seat next to him, and dropped a kiss on top of her head. He understood, if she didn’t, how hard it was going to be to go back to being just friends. He started the car, smiled at her, and suggested taking the long way home. Neither wanted the night to end, because in light there are no illusions. There are no soft shadows that hide what wants have exposed themselves to the light. When dawn came, they knew they would be separated again. So they drove the winding roads, holding hands, talking lightly of things that didn’t really matter because neither could say the things that did. Things like ‘I love you’, ‘It matters’ ‘It isn’t just a dream’. Both knew in that direction lay only madness and despair. It was enough to make a grown girl cry, knowing the one that had been the source of her dreams as a child was costing her them now. Knowing that in loving his best.
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